I had just opened my computer to read some emails I had downloaded. One subject line said: “A Toast to Demitra.”  I was so excited – this was a woman who I knew in London, a set designer, who was super vivacious, effervescent – so excited about life!  I immediately thought she was coming to New York, maybe she was getting married or opening a show. Last October, she took me to a beautiful lounge in London to celebrate my upcoming wedding – we drank wine, talked about friends from school, about the Kane’s workshops on living in the moment – she had planned to come to Hamburg for the next workshop…In astonishment, I read that she had passed away.  As tears splashed down on my keyboard, I wished it wasn’t true, I wished I had stayed in better touch, I wished I had been a better friend, that I had invited her one more time, wished I could tell her that her smile brightened my life every single solitary time I saw her, wished I had told my husband Rod I loved him before he left today…

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The Kanes often often often talk about ‘letting the universe support you,’ instead of driving ahead toward reaching something that is yet unattained, but known -
as opposed to letting the universe support you into something great that you may not yet know about!!!

So I am walking down the street and run into a pack of literally 40 or so Labrador Retriever puppies, all wearing vests that say Guide Dog Puppy-in-Training.  Now – I have just written a book that involves laboradors, Guide Dogs, and Search and Rescue Dogs – I am very aware of how astonishingly important these dogs are as service dogs both to the blind and to police and fire departments. They are here today looking for volunteers to raise puppies.

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Hello Everyone!

I just returned from Costa Rica and … Wow! By the end of the week, I knew that I wanted to return next year, and knew I wanted to stay longer. So I signed up for 2 weeks in 2010!

How completely unreasonable of me! I truly just did what I wanted to do, without allowing the details to dominate me. In that moment, I abandoned my old comfortable habit of having everything in order before I acted on something. I didn’t ask permission from anyone, I didn’t ask permission from my bank account, and I didn’t ask permission from my reasonable mind. I simply gave myself permission, and trusted the universe to support me.

This unreasonable impulse has also allowed me to see so many other things that I want to do this year, including taking Committed Impulse acting classes, going to Germany, taking the Kanes’ workshops, and paying off my credit cards.

Have a brilliant and unreasonable week!

Love,
Swain

Dear Transformers all over the world,

I want to wish you a transformational New Year and share a little story. In the last conversation I had with Ariel and Shya they asked if I am still sober.  I suddenly realized that I am sober now for more than two years (I had been drinking since I was 16 am now 40) and that I have my driver’s license back for more than a year now (I lost it, guess why?). But the most amazing thing is that it has become so normal to me (not drinking), that in the moment of the question I thought in my head, “why do they ask?”. You can get used to the good things as well as to the “bad” things. Before my sobriety it would have been unimaginable to live a life without alcohol, now I can’t imagine drinking every day, as I did.

Being pulled over by the police, being arrested for the night and loosing my license (as a caterer) for 11 months had a very strong impact. Combined with a great partner (my wife Maiken), great coaching (guess who that was) and a great community (that’s you guys!) it was possible for me to start a new life.

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