The Tale of Lady Midas
Sunday, November 9th, 2008I feel soooo self-expressive and have to share with you what happened to me since the wonderful workshop “The Art of Listening” in Hamburg, Germany in October! I had been really looking forward to it because as a Psychologist, I spend my life listening to other people. Ironically, during the workshop something funny happened; I suddenly saw that it was time to stop hiding by only listening to what other people had to say. It was time to listen to myself!
So I had one of my intimate talks with life and said: “Look, I know that I can be of help to people and would love to do it, so if you see a way of supporting me, now would be a good time…”
I have a strong interest in using a communication method called “Marte Meo”, meaning ‘on one’s strength’. It is something not traditionally used by Psychologists, yet aligns perfectly with the Kanes’ Workshops on ‘Living in the Moment’. It’s something that can be used by parents or anyone working with children. In my “plan”, I sat down and decided to contact all the Pediatricians in Hamburg and introduce myself so they can refer people to me…
On Saturday, Artur (my husband) and I headed off to visit his family (brother, Celso; sister-in-law, Steph; niece; nephew; and sister, Idilia.) Now, I have a confession to make: I usually dread these visits. I usually fail to implement the brilliant suggestion Ariel & Shya make about doing things as if they were your own idea. Instead, I usually sit in their living room, or in their garden, and make small talk while I count the minutes until we can leave. For, while I love Idilia very much and am very close to her, the rest of the family I have just never connected with at all. I’ve given myself many reasons for this, reasons that mostly allow the responsibility to fall outside of myself! : we’re so different, we have nothing in common, they’re not interested in me, I’m not interested in them, we don’t care about the same things, they’re boring, they just talk small talk, there is no chance to get deeper with them - no chance to make a real connection… So, every time I would go, while holding tightly to my judgments, my heart closed to any other possibility of what it might be like to be with them. Well, the weekend started out with me still like this, and, as we set off to drive south, Artur and I started bickering a bit, and I realised it was because I was resisting the situation and blaming him for it. So I stopped, right then, apologised, and made a commitment to myself to embrace the trip, the people and choose to actually have fun!
Ever since attending the Time and Project Management course, I find myself looking at my life as though it is a river of opportunities to be a role model, a healing presence and available for everybody around me.
March 3, 2008, Monday morning, 9:00 a.m. I eagerly sit at my new desk in the law library of the Appellate Division, Second Judicial Department, in Brooklyn, New York – often recognized as the busiest appellate court in the nation [1]. For over two years, I worked at the Appellate Division as a Court Attorney, serving the Justices of the Court and supporting them in reaching fair and just decisions. My name was on numerous memoranda of law and confidential reports submitted to the Court. However, until about two months ago, I doubt if any of the 22 Justices would even recognize my face.
